I can't even tell you how good it feels to be settled in and not living in piles of boxes. AHHH! It's kinda weird now. I dont know what to do with myself. Work kept me so busy and then school was out and we were so busy packing. Then last week i put myself on bedrest to keep the little guy in. Now we are moved and I feel like he should be here. No more waiting. Because i have been worried for a month now that this baby is coming early, he feels late! And when i started trying to induce labor on my own and it didnt work i just got frustrated. Being full term is a mix of emotions. I feel:
excited
anxious
scared out of my mind
blessed
wishing for just one more day with jesse as just the two of us to a minute later jumping off the couch hoping my water would break.
And all these emotions flow back and forth in a matter of minutes.
Its hard being a first-time-mom because you just dont know what to expect, what to imagine, what to dream about. What will it be like to delver a baby? What will it be like to look into his eyes the first time? Will he have blonde or brown hair? How can you really wake up every 2-3 hours for feedings? What will life be like for us as a new family of 3? In less than 48 hours i will know all the answers to these questions. Wow.
Jen-
ReplyDeleteI love your post! It's like I could have written the exact same thing about all those emotions. I was really apprehensive last night and then today there was a reminder from the Lord that He created this person and gave him/her to us because we are the parents s/he needs. It was incredibly comforting to know that the Creator has chose this time, this place, and this family for our little one. I love thinking the exact same thing about your little boy joining the Singer family!
BLESSINGS!
Jen, I felt ALL of those things too! I remember feeling sad that Nick and I wouldn't just be us anymore... to wanting the baby to come THAT MINUTE two seconds later. I hated the fear of the unknown with labor and was sooooo nervous about what to do during & after and when we brought him home!
ReplyDeleteLet me tell you: YOU WILL DO GREAT! Your body is made to go through labor, so trust that & your doctor and know that they will do what's best for you. Stay calm & relax (I know that sounds stupid, but it works trust me) and that moment that you look at his sweet face any other fear you had will disappear. It's not always easy, but it's always worth it & wonderful. The love you feel for him will be like NOTHING you have ever felt.
I am so excited for you guys.
I will be praying all day tomorrow that things go smoothly & I can't wait to see pictures!!!!!!!!!
Love you!
Assuming you're still on for tomorrow morning unless JJ has other plans ... so excited for you! It's very hard for us to believe it's been a whole year since we were in your shoes!
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